Starting a new relationship

Nov 30, 2014

Starting a new relationship is an exciting time.

Good relationships are good for us. If you are thinking about starting a new relationship or are already in a new relationship there are many things to think about.

All relationships require effort

You may need to give some thought as to the best ways to find the right person for you, or you might be lucky and meet someone you like through a friend, at work or through a shared interest. What ever happens, look after yourself and stay safe.

A new relationship can be magical from the start, or it may start off slowly, but in the end, all relationships need thought and effort if you are both going to remain happy.

When is the right time to start a new relationship?

The simple answer is after you have fully come to terms with the end of your previous relationship.  It takes time, especially if you didn’t want the previous relationship to end. Being alone is not easy after being married or in a long-term relationship, especially if you have children living with you.

In thinking about the best time to re-partner consider:

  • are you emotionally free?  Can you put all your emotional energy into a new relationship without allowing your feelings about the previous relationship to get in the way?
  • do you find yourself thinking about your ex-partner and do these thoughts still arouse strong feelings such as anger and resentment?
  • have you adjusted to being single?
  • have you regained your self-confidence?
  • can you look back on your previous relationship and recognise some of the things that contributed to its breakdown?
  • have you talked through all the issues that might arise in a new relationship?

Listen to any doubts you may have. Talking to a counsellor might help you resolve some of the past issues that are still affecting you. If necessary, wait a little longer.